Thursday, 9 April 2015

Thoughts on faults.

   Things with Mad Girl and I are not looking good. I was told off for not showing I cared enough. Which surprised me a bit as I thought things were fine and dandy We talked about it (more on that in a minute) and whilst I show I care in a number of ways, these don't count and I mean don't count. If instead I laid on the sofa permanently and mumbled "Iluvyou" as she past by, then things would be fine. It's my fault (you see, even without thinking I know as a man, it's my fault) very early on in our relationship whilst out shopping, I was asked my opinion about something she tried on. "Ooh it's nice" I said. Nice??? Nice, I was told is a none word. It means nothing. In fact it's better to say nothing than to use the "N" word. You can't imagine how difficult it's been for a me, over the last three years without "nice" I'm like a rabbit trapped between the head lights. What should I say, I know "wonderful" no I used that word yesterday em em "ooh that's rather special" ok I got away with it for now.
   Back to the talk, I was told off in a pub while we were having a drink, well I was given a list of things I wasn't doing/ not good at. At first I defended myself but then thought, this wasn't the best place to discuss our relationship So said so and as this was important to me as well, we should talk about this more but somewhere where we both felt a little more secure and private. Agreed. We both sat there and finished our drinks in a slightly frosty small talk way.
   Rightly or wrongly, I felt this was something for Mad Girl to decide on the best time to continue but nothing was mentioned again when we had time together. Now I'm not a complete bonehead and knew things would only get worse if left. So I offered to go over and cook one Saturday while she had to work. She joined me and while we sliced and diced a number of vegetables and finger tips, I asked if she would like to talk about what had been touched on in the pub. So we did and it went back a long way. Too long, to the point where small things have become magnified and as happens, other things get conveniently forgotten. I have many faults as does she but I don't think I'm difficult to talk to or lack understanding.
   I don't want another relationship where things get bottled up like this. Sadly it looks like Mad Girl and I are destined to be just good friends (((
   I took the "slow-cooker" down from the high shelf yesterday. Never has a piece of kitchen cook wear been better named. Seeing as it's taken me just over a year to get round to using it. I did a very straight forward beef stew and very nice it was too. I felt extremely pleased with myself. While I swanned around Margate harbour and the old town. Looking at the paintings in the "Turner Contemporary" and all the tat for sale in the junk shops. The "slow-cooker" cooked. I arrived home, busting for a pee (one pint too many at the "Harbour Arm") and as I rushed up the stairs to the bathroom I was struck by the lovely smell of cooked food. It was as if fairies had invaded and made me dinner. An hour or so later. Full of stew and smugness I set about moving bits and pieces here and there in my temporary kitchen. It still looks like a building site but one where you can now get an omelette instead of food poisoning to go with your big mug of builders tea and six sugars.

Onwards and upwards in search of fulfillment :-)))


  1. Relationships are tough. Multi millions have been spent by people trying to fix them. Here's the thing, though. Women hold all the power. Every bit of it. And if we don't tell the man what we want and how we want it (and no, I'm not talking about sex) he doesn't know. Men cannot read minds. And women play stupid games instead of being honest. It's a shitty way to run the world.

    I think most women expect men to cater to them. To figure out what they want and worship them. That's okay, I have a man who has put my happiness ahead of his own for 36 years. But there's another half to that... the same 36 years, I've been trying to make sure he's happy, too. That I appreciate who he is and how he is and that he gives 100% to me. I figure I owe him the same.

    Good luck working things out.

  2. Thanks Aims, I'm not complaining. She does have a point and I am at fault. However I don't want another relationship where things don't get discussed. I hope I didn't come across as hard done by. I just wanted to get it down so in time I look back and remind myself on how things went and how I felt )))