Build a track record.

   So back to Steve Chandlers book and chapter 9. It's a short and to the point chapter. He talks about one of the guests at a seminar he gave. The guy approached him and said he had a problem finishing things and could he give him an affirmation that might help. SC tells him the best way to change his belief system is to change the truth about himself. The truth being stronger than a false affirmation. He would need to build a record of finished tasks/jobs. The fella brought a notebook. Headed it "Things I've finished" and off he went, writing down each thing big or small he had completed. SC sums up the chapter by adding how much more permanent this man's new belief system would be rather than anything affirmations could do (as they had failed for him before). Although I've read through the book twice, I'd forgotten this chapter. If you've read the blog for any length of time you'll know I more or less keep a book of things to be done that day. I think I need to add a section at the back where I list the stuff completed and a short positive summing up of the week or month. I've also been finishing off outstanding business, paperwork and little jobs that are long overdue and in future don't plan to leave bits not finished. That kind of stuff weighs heavily on me and it would seem an easy one to stop.
   NicE left a long and thoughtful comment to my last post. Which I haven't published yet. It deserves an answer which requires a little thought on my part. I appreciate comments. It's always a boost to know someone is reading or following a blog and as already mentioned they deserve a little thought and care in replying too.         
   In other news..... My window boxes. The first I've ever attempted, are still flourishing despite me not always being around. I brought some heather in readiness to replace the little flowers when they finally give up.  
   I guess I'm doing what every newbie coast dweller does. Collect shells from the beach. It all started because, I had a small glass vase and thought it would be fun to fill it with shell's. A friend liked it and gave me another bigger glass vase and I filled that. Now it's becoming a regular thing, when friends drop by, we walk along the beach, talk, say "hello" to passing joggers, dog walkers etc, look at the ship's out at sea and of course, pick up shells. I'm glad of the help. As the latest vase is a huge fecker. I've added a picture with a credit card size card at the bottom so you can get some idea of how big it is. So I've become a bit of a "size queen." Small and interesting no longer cuts it. Biggest is best, well at least till this vase is full. Going on "Shell Safari" whether alone or with someone, follows the same pattern. Check the tide is out on my phone app, stuff old plastic bag into the back of my Levi's. Close the door, cross the road and walk the few hundred yards down to the cut between the cliffs and I'm (we're) on the beach. I(we) wander along not really seeing much. Then bingo, it's Shellsville a patch of sand and rock covered with a mixed collection of vacated shells. Where do all those little sea creatures go? Some are wonderfully coloured. Why, I don't know, as this stretch of the North Sea is very murky. So it's not as if they're showing off to the other shells in the rock-pool, is it. If I have company, it doesn't take long before they turn into a kid again. Picking up any tiny rock or broken shell and being told "no that's a stone, no that's a tiny dead crab," which they speedily fling away, crying "URRRRRR" as the dead crab moves faster than it every did when it was alive, disappearing with a "plop" back into the murky North Sea. Then they hit their stride and actually start finding shells. At some point they will find one which they hold back from the bag "Ummm I think I might keep this one." 

Late yesterday afternoon low tide was around 6 and Sunset was about half an hour later. So I thought along with a few shell's I might get a couple of shots of the Sun disappearing below the waves. Unfortunately it went down behind some clouds. So no stunning pictures except when I turned to come home there was the moon and I carefully steeped around the rock pools near the waters edge I managed to get it's reflection in one of those pools. it was taken with my phone. I really should take my camera. I think it won't be long before vase no3 is full. So my walks along the beach won't entail lugging a couple of pounds worth of shells with me. Just the odd special one or two. Well that's enough for today (and something to cross off in my book).

Onwards and upwards in the pursuit of fulfillment :-)))
  

Empty space.

   I'm giving my "book chapter review a post" a rest today. For the last couple of weeks I've had a real lack of enthusiasm for everything. Everything but sleep and staring into space. Nothing notable has happened, it just crept up one night when I was asleep. It's been a while since I've felt like this and I thought "right get it down in print" but I feel such a dick having to admit it in print, I've delayed getting it down.
   Not letting myself surrender to it works short term. So a walk, making myself put stuff away, cooking something, clearing the back log of washing up, a bit of laundry, ironing, I know it's not exactly taxing but as I say it works for a while.
   However it's a long term answer I'm after. So the delay in admitting I'm a dick has been spent in some thought. Firstly, the common response from those close is, "you're just depressed." Well no I'm not. Depression covers a huge spectrum and we use it like a "get out of jail free card." So although I'm a dick, I'm not going to hide behind a label. I'm not depressed or suffering from depression. I do/don't do something that over a period of time leads me here and I don't suffer, I think I find some strange comfort in my emptiness. It's those close to me who suffer.
   So what is it I do/don't do that leads me here. I thought long and hard about this. Firstly it's internal, it's not someone or something outside that brings it on. I start things and don't have a very organised way of getting them done. I'll easily find something to distract me or if I hit a problem, decide it's best to go round it and come back to it later. I'm also very adapt at making people around me think that the problem is theirs not mine. So lots and lots of starts but not many finishes. It builds and builds then pop, nothingness. That's about it in a nutshell.
   Well almost. I'm sure I could delve back into my past and find out where it's origins lay but I'm as old as God so don't have the time or inclination for that. I must not start anything new where possible or something else is truly finished. Chip away at those things already started, in strict order of their importance. There are one or two other things where I should cut my loses and move on. I need to follow a set plan, regardless of how I feel.  I have to be the strong parent to my spoilt child.
   Enough of me.

Onwards and upwards in the pursuit of fulfillment )))       

Push all your own buttons......

   Steve Chandler starts chapter 8 of  "100 Ways to Motivate Yourself" with a description of the cockpit of an airliner. All the buttons dials and levers that the pilot uses to get us smoothly and safely from A to B and how, if we happened  to hear one pilot say to the other, "remind me what those buttons do again?" the journey wouldn't feel so smooth and safe.
   He then goes on to say that many of us move through life not really knowing what and where all our own buttons, dials and levers are and if we did, we would fly smoother and safer. So get to know what pushes your buttons. If its a song that lifts you. Don't wait for it to come on the radio. Buy it, record it, have it somewhere close. Then play it, to lift your spirits or motivate you, as often as you need it. It may be something else. A walk, a passage from a book, a smell. Whatever it is, bring it closer. Use that lever.
   In other news. I woke up to the news that Robin Williams was dead. It's sad to think that someone so talented, smart and funny ends their life. Unable to reach out for help and unable to believe that there is help. There is still along way to go. RIP Robin.
 
The faster we move onwards and upwards, we'll find answers gain more and lose less.

Look for the lost gold....

   So it's chapter/motivation number 7, "Looking for the lost gold" from Steve Chandler's book. It's an easy one maybe to recognize in others. Someone you know always see the bad in something or always see's the funny side of things. It's a bit harder to see it in ourselves. At what point does my negativity or positivity start. Why do I get frustrated when stuck in traffic? and then blame anybody and everybody when the truth is I haven't given the journey enough time, planned or left some flexibility in my day. So I don't see the gold but I'm working on it. Equally there are things I always see in a positive light. Ummm what to do? Well I guess I could start my day, by looking for the gold in everything and all of a sudden the obstacles that frustrate are replaced instead with opportunities to see, feel, hear or get to do things differently and with joy. As SC says, "Your opportunities will multiply when you choose to see them."
   In other news. It's a slight coincidence that today we're looking for gold as I received, in the post. My first pair of reading glasses this week. After about 18 months of "I must get an eye test." I finally got round to it (my first since school). So now I can read the ingredients on the back of a packet or a book without holding it at arms length. As well as being able to read things, I'm also trying to strike intelligent poses in my new spectacles. Sadly without much success. I look more like the long lost brother of Dr Bunsun from the Muppets or Penfold from Danger Mouse. I'll let you do the Google image searches, while I practice a few more looks in the mirror.

Onwards and upwards in the pursuit of fulfillment )))     

Simplify your life.

   I missed out a chapter of Steve Chandlers book last time out. I guess I'm starting to wonder if it was such a good idea to promise to summarize a chapter a post but a promise is a promise. So chapter 7 "Simplify your life." The chapter deals with combining things to give yourself more time and doing things now and not putting things off. The simpler you keep it, the stronger it gets. Things are difficult when you're confused. When you simplify life, then that life gains focus.
   Each chapter has a little nugget within and going back over it either re-enforces the message or reveals something I missed. A promise is a promise.
   I'll have finished the two jobs I'm working on by the middle of next week and can then start pulling the old roof off my house and fitting the new one. It will be the start of putting something back into the house and not just ripping things out.
   I've changed a lot in the last few years all for the good. Although there are still one or two things I don't do well or avoid. Simplifying things has helped and I could probably do with taking another look and seeing if there are areas which I may still avoid either consciously or unconsciously. I'm not going to go into this in detail. Most of you, us want to see, hear or taste the results not get bogged down in someone elses life detail. so you're spared for the moment )))

   There was a huge shipped moored just off the beach at the end of the road at the weekend, waiting to complete its journey up to Sheerness or Tilbury but it didn't matter how many pictures or from how many angles I captured it, it just didn't look as big as it was. So sorry for the underwhelming picture but it's my blog and it's going in.

   I started writing this, this morning feeling pretty lazy and uninspired. funny how ten minutes typing can change things. So I'm off to be a better person.

Onwards and upwards in search of fulfillment )))         

Going home......

   So ........ I'm not blogging that often recently. It's all down to poor planning. I like to note where I am emotionally, geographically and any other ally's I've missed but working away from home during the week kind of curtails internet time and when I'm home, well I'm dumping whatever I've ripped out or catching up on sleep, so that stops me faffing on about life online . Or and this has a sentence all of it's own, listening to the seagulls on my roof ! My roof is old and flat. so old in fact, it's no longer flat. It dips in the middle. There's usually a few inches of water up there and the gulls seem to like a drink/bathe early in the morning, say around 5. I lay in bed and listen to them walking about. I can hear the water sloshing around too. I hear the odd occasional fight, followed by a bit of seagull squawking and on one memorable occasion, a rather large bird falling past my window after being turfed off the roof. I leapt out of bed, expecting to see a dead or at least a concussed seagull in the basement. Instead there was a head bobbing bird, walking between the rubble bags and the rotten wood that is my front garden trying to get his/her wits back and probably planning revenge on his/her rival who was happily cooling his feet and bum in my make shift bird bath a few feet above my bed. So you understand why I record so little and so infrequently.
   I'm off home tomorrow afternoon. For less than twenty four hours this time but enough time to water my window boxes, watch what I want on tv, sleep in my own bed and load the car with rubbish before I set off to see a friend for a couple of days. Sleep in an uncomfortable bed and eat things I don't really want to. Call me ungrateful and to a certain extent I am but really, all I want to do. Is listen to the strange early morning ablutions of my neighbourhood seagulls from the oh so comfortable bed that rarely gets to transport me to dreamland these days. Walk along the beach picking up shells whilst saying hello to complete strangers as they jog by and filling the boot of my car with more crap and delivering it to the local dump. where no doubt several very clean seagulls wander about looking for lunch.

Ok, I'm history.

Onwards and upwards in the pursuit of fullfilment )))   

The more you sweat in peacetime the less you bleed in war.

 

    If I don't get my finger out and summarize these chapters the book will be out of print before you have the chance to get your own copy. Chapter 5 is titled "learn to sweat in peace."  the harder you are on yourself, the easier life is on you. While this is a favorite of mine, striking the right balance with yourself is the difficult bit. There is no doubt in my mind that when you're deep in gloom, you don't always make good decisions.So being hard on yourself takes a bit of skill.
 In other news. I sold a painting I brought at auction a little while ago. I brought it because I liked the frame. So I've kept that and the picture has been sold. I managed to get back almost the whole cost, so I'm feeling a little smug. I have a few things that either came with things I brought or I brought solely for the purpose of reselling. My aim is to get back what I spent. Thereby the things kept, I would of got for free or very cheaply.There's a long way to go but I'm in no rush.
   I'm struggling to get a job finished. I'm finding lots of excuses to knuckle down and get it finished. There are a few things going on in my head. Any one or maybe all of them, have a part to play. I just need to find my focus. Once I'm done I can spend a few weeks working on my house. There's a local best front garden competition going on and while my front garden has an ever changing pile of building rubbish on it. Window boxes and hanging baskets are included and I have window boxes. I'm not expecting to win but it's nice to be involved with something local at last.

   The weather last Sunday was so good I took a chair, flask of coffee and a bacon roll down to the beach for breakfast. I sat there for a couple of hours, read the papers, watched the sea roll in and picked up a few shells to put in my jar. The only time I can remember having breakfast by the sea was when on holiday. So I'm lucky. To think where I was when I started writing this blog to now. Well I wouldn't of believed things could of changed so much. this coming weekend is looking good too. I just need to wear a hat next time.Well that's about it. Till next time.

Onwards and upwards in the pursuit of fulfillment :-)))