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Wednesday, 15 February 2012

What's a blog for?

   The reason I started blogging was to keep a diary. Something I could look back on and see the improvements. It was also the safest option too (I'd loose a real diary). I really didn't believe anybody else would bother to read it either, why would they?
   The first surprise, was the cycles that began to appear. I'd look back and see that every couple of months things would look and sound the same. Second surprise, was other people reading my blog and just like a toddler who realizes they are the centre of attention. I played up to my (small) audience. Since then things have been pretty settled. My spelling and word power have improved, I get a lot of enjoyment out of writing and yes, also seeing how many page views there have been for any particular day and the comments left.
   Today I spot the third surprise. I'm not at my best mood wise but  I don't like writing sad !. I'm late for work and the usual misery demons are at the front of the queue, waiting to get in. However there are positives in many forms but the demons have pushed them back to the back of the queue. So my cards are stacked and I should be able to play a really good hand of "woe is me" but I can't do it. I want to write something uplifting for ME. Something that pushes me out of the door and in to something interesting. My blog is starting to develop into a useful little tool to extract me from dark corners, Ithat creep up on me from time to time. I started to feel a bit off Friday. So wrote myself out of blogging for a bit with Busy Days. Just to give myself some time alone. So my ideas could peculate and because I could see the fog floating in.
   Well it can just float on by. Work's moving forward, albeit very slowly. I'm starting to love the odd thing or two about me (sorry if that makes you feel a bit nauseous, it does look a bit daft in print but it's true and truth is what I'm after) and my thoughts are more in the here and now than in the future or the past. I'm feeling a little better already.
   My writing is here for me to attack and not to defend. I shall poke the first demon who comes near me in the eye, stamp on his toe and laugh like Mr Roosevelt above (who ironed his shirts?). Write whatever you want, if it makes you happy. There, now I understand. I'm writing to make myself happy. The biggest surprise so far lol.

Onwards and upwards in the pursuit of fulfillment and happyness :-)

  

5 comments:

  1. I write for myself, too. Not that I don't love all the feedback, the followers (lost one this week) and the friendships I've formed.

    Oh, and cute British guys who come and leave poetry to make me smile first thing in the morning.

    :)

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    1. That will start tongues wagging Aim's :-)

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  2. I write so that I don't yell at people in real life. I am trying to be more positive to push my melancholia away but that doesn't always work. I try not to check the followers and page views because it's not supposed to matter. It does matter though because I always hope to see a comment that tells me I'm not nutso or a little nugget of wisdom or advice. It looks to me like nobody ironed his shirt.

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    1. I'm out of nuggets but your no nutso !

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  3. Hope you are okay, Spanner.

    x P

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