Wednesday, 2 March 2011

Day 335. Still failing but not a failure. Part 2.

Today was another apathy day. Another day spent on the sofa. Another wasted day. So what to do? I can feel guilty about it, which will take up time or I can sign it off as, a bad day and move on.

 I'm 52 I've lived through 18980 plus days so far they weren't all bad. In fact I'd say most were good and very few were bad. Did I dwell on the good days? No, so it's a waste to dwell on the bad ones. Is that what makes me a "depressive" dwelling on the bad and not focusing on the good. The bad just reinforces the low self opinion I have of myself. I'd like to concentrate on the successes and there have been many but there's a blockage. I don't feel worthy enough to pat myself on the back for the successes.

 I've always considered that the things I can do can be done by everyone and with a little application I can learn what others can do too. This is probably a bad basis to build a life on. If I cannot appreciate that I have skills that will impress others and I fail to appreciate the skills of others, however humble. Then I'm a rudderless boat. Just going where the wind blows me.

 I've almost reached the 28th day of the lemon and French thing. So it's almost an official habit. I'm going to add some affirmation time to that now in an effort to bring things back round to the gains I thought I was making.

Tonight is "Stuff on the web" I've been looking for weird and strange things. Which I thought would be simple but it isn't. So bear with me while I get in the groove.

Onwards and upwards :~)

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